The Misguided March: For my male mates, and the ladies trying to copy them.
“You think you have time,” Jack Kornfield once said – but do you?
For many high-achieving men in their 40s and 50s, the relentless pursuit of success has become a suffocating burden.
The corporate warriors who played by the rules, arrived early, stayed late, endured the commute, and made sacrifices are now worn out, stressed, and struggling to keep up – on almost all levels – work, wife, and life.
And yet they still wear their inability to switch off like a badge of honour, held aloft by their pride and ego.
Well done, you’re very nearly at the end.
Always on, always available, always working, always distracted from the moment – we all know the sort.
The sort that can bring their stress to any situation, always needing time to decompress, and so we wait, lend an ear, and let them vent.
Their decompression is very much needed, like the most unpleasant form of osmosis, tolerated before any connection can truly begin, and so we smile, tolerate, and try to show understanding – they’re not well, despite their insistence.
As friends and family, we’re passengers to their lifestyles; we may even benefit from their efforts, but we feel the weight of their exhaustion, and their stress is catching, regrettable at best, and so we learn what’s coming before and during each encounter.
It’s not them we see first; it’s the stress we feel first, a symptom of their actions and choices.
And so, as friends and family who love, we’re patient (again), and so we will be next time also.
But isn’t it heartbreaking to see their misguided pride and ego front and centre of their desire to carry on doing more and more – until???
Until what?
Until you get everything?
Until you die?
And so, after a moment of listening, we ask:
“How’s it going?” .
“Yeah, good,” they lie…
The world has changed.
And so have the rules of success for these career focused warriors.
Legislation, societal expectations, financial pressures, the economy, wars, and AI have redrawn the career and office landscape entirely.
They can no longer rely on charm, experience, or mentorship to get ahead; it has virtually no value.
Instead, the focus is on efficiency, speed, and flawless execution – a daunting task for anyone, let alone those in midlife trying to keep ahead of those half their age, on half the salary, and with twice the enthusiasm.
The irony is cruel.
Just as they thought they were hitting their stride, and whilst barely into their 50s, the corporate treadmill has sped up again – to 11.
They’re now running, except they can barely jog.
They’re slower, less able, less willing and M&S suit is too tight and shows the sweat – and so they fall off, but no-one comes to their aid, and no one in the office cares.
Yet for them and their loved ones the impact is devastating, they didn’t even brace for impact – totally broken.
Drop the logo, ego and pride.
Today, your value lies not in your output for the brand but in your simple existence and how you connect with those you care about, the rest will come.
Your legacy isn’t measured by unread emails, your company car, or the deals you’re working on, it about who wants to spend time with you.
Let’s remember, we are only a collection of connections and memories, and nothing more.
Take the slow road.
Enjoy the journey.
Value those willing to spend time with you and turn up ready to connect if you can.
I ask again – “How long have you got?”
Paul
camping jedi 
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